The X Factor 2012 live shows continued last night on ITV1, and here's what we thought!
The remaining eleven contestants took to the stage to perform club classics, and it was a bit of a disappointing night all round.
We can only imagine that Gary Barlow is going out of his way to make Cruise Ship Chris as cheesy as possible, as tonight's performance - somehow - managed to be even worse than his first two.
"I let them pick their own songs this week," Louis Walsh said, to the surprise of precisely no one.
And THANK GOD these guys decided to ditch Louis, but a pointless mashup let them down. However props must be given for the pair actually singing a track which we'd actually hear anywhere near a club.
Jahmene doesn't need the sob story VT and showed exactly why with this amazing vocal performance. We'll even overlook the fact that the song has little to no connection with the theme whatsoever.
Jade Ellis was up next, who had had the "worst week ever" and was "singing for her life". But before we get worried, Jade just had a sore throat, apparently life can't get much worse than that.
The mum of one's voice was on point on usual, but we were rather distracted after the show's styling team had clearly made use of Amelia Lily's leftover hair dye to barbie up the 25-year-old.
James Arthur took to the stage next, performing the same song he did just a few weeks ago at judges' houses. While the song may have originally been a "club classic", James' version makes us want to call it a night ans head to bed.
One Direction impersonators Union J follow with a fairly average performance. "You need more harmonies," say Gary and Nicole, as if any of their thousands of screaming teenage fans care.
SOUND THE MASH UP KLAXON. Rylan is back on stage and flashing the flesh. This is Rylan's perfect theme (apparently) but the vocals are possibly the worst we've heard all series from Rylan. None the less, the performance is by far the most related to the theme and certainly a boost of much needd energy.
It's Club Classics week and Lucy Spraggan is with her guitar again performing just as she has every other week. "That was so clever," gushes Gary sickly. But it's all becoming a blur to us, despite the judges praise we're getting quite bored of Lucy's performances.
Lovely chap Kye Sones follows. His performance is "epic" according to Nicole, while Tulisa gives Kye what we can only assume is a bit of a swipe by comparing him to Chris Martin. While we weren't fans, even we wouldn't have gone that far.
District3 show off their vocals and like MK1 before them have clearly chosen their own tracks. It shows, and they nail it. We're much preferring this group over the four soloists who make up Union J after tonight's show.
Ella "She's only 16!" Henderson closes the show. 16-year-old Ella, 16, decides to do some dance moves for club classics week. "I can't wait to step away from the mic stand," Ella, who is sixteen, says, before staying well and truly glued to it for the duration of her performance. Cringey hand dance moves aside, Ella's vocals once again shine.
BUT THAT'S JUST OUR VIEW
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[cat c="the x factor"]The X Factor 2012[/cat] live shows continue at 7PM tonight with the latest results show.
As well as featuring the latest sing off and subsequent elimination, Sunday's evening's episode will also feature performances from JLS and Labrinth.